Black Diamond Self-Talk

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Half Empty or Full - You Choose

Happy Holidays to All 2013

      Please take a moment to reflect on What Is Most Important In Your Life as we move into a new year. Tony, Lisa, Michael, Noelle, Amanda and Curt.

      Most of our friends know that my parents are both gone, and Lisa's Dad passed almost 4 years ago. We were left with incredible holes in our Heart’s, but, because we put our Golf Balls into our jar first the best parts of Barry, Tony Sr. and Ann Marie live on in our lives forever.

      I'd like to relate a little story for all of you.

      A professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him.

      When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

      The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.

      He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

      The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full.

      The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.' The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

      'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things -god, family, children, health, friends, and favorite passions – things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

      The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else - the small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

      The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

      So... pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner.

      There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first - the things that really matter. Set your priorities.

      The rest is just sand.' One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. 'I'm glad you asked.

      It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'

      Our family and team Believes in You and Your Dreams, we hope You will take the time to reflect and relive the most important part of this amazing life.

We Believe In You
Tony & Lisa Koker
1-781-864-2624 anytime.
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Image credit: CanStockPhoto.com

Friday, December 20, 2013

Decision and Action

Decision and Action

      I decide all the time. Whenever I add a task to one of my lists, I've already decided it needed to be done. I've developed quite a talent for putting things down and keeping track of them.
      One of the mistakes I have made often involves my mental excitement and pleasure I get from mentally visualizing these tasks as complete. Don't get me wrong, on the way to getting these things done, this is an important step. The more realistic I can visualize the task as complete, the easier it is for me to do it. My mistake has often been the elation I feel having identified the task and writing it down, ends up being gratification enough, right now, to make me feel I've got things all planned and ready. At least for right now. The mistake I often make, after a little time has elapsed, is to revisit the list(s) and discover ways to make them even better. I find holes that need new solutions. Real or imagined, I second-guess myself until I plan myself to another point of elation, or not. Revisiting these decisions and plans is where I go astray. I have had to work on the habit of deciding now. Closing the plan, having decided the steps, and begin the doing. If there are minor corrections that need to be made, I just need to let go and adjust along the way.
      Through the reading of this book (Think and Grow Rich), and with the help of my mentors, I've found that I need to let go of this decision process of mine. I need to focus on just one more list - my to do list. I've actually renamed this to my ACTION list. My self-talk keeps me focused and motivated, and my ACTION list tells me exactly what I need to be doing, and deciding to change the list, is NOT on the list.
      I am continually grateful for the participation and support of this system (here and here) - the people who mastermind and fellowship each other in peace today and towards greater joy tomorrow.
with gratitude and in service,
Tony Koker
Image credit: CanStockPhoto.com